I had the childhood dream of becoming an artist, drawing was what I loved most.. I was always a smart kid, good grades and reports until my dad got cancer when I was 14, and my trust in life was broken when he died a year later.
By the time I was an young adult, having dropped out of high school, I had given up.. Western society has many ways of discouraging kids from becoming creative freethinkers, and little relief as far as existential questions for suffering teens... All of this ate at my soul, and I turned to self medicating and became deeply addicted to heroin and alcohol. At age 23, after 4 years living in the streets, I was on a plane to Peru to experience San Pedro medicine, hoping for a way where all else had failed. Through the grace of my family who helped pay for my ticket, on the leap of faith that plant medicines could help me where everything else had failed.. This was January 2013.
Coming off 90mg of methadone cold turkey is quite horrendous, as just like in the movie "Trainspotting" I was persecuted by paranoid delusions of the mind, and suffered intense insomnia and body aches, for about 3 weeks. The mescaline treatment and helpers at the center helped a lot, even though I think I almost freaked them out a few times. I was seeing dead bodies in the garden and believed there where bombs in the basement, among other things. After the 21 days I was out of the nightmare and started healing my relationship with life. As the first month was coming to a close and I was meant to go home, I was offered to stay for longer and eventually became a volunteer. I'll cut this part of the story short for now, and hope to release my full tale one day...
After learning how to live again, 7 years ago my intuition told me to start painting, as I delved deeper with the master plants. I found a way in which to flow, a place from which to paint and sing, and the well of inspiration is overflowing... It gives me so much Peace everyday and I wish everyone to find their own creative outlet. Instead of indulging in destructive behavior, I have been able to create, create and create. When I'm feeling down, I transmute those feelings and emotions into works of art, and when I'm feeling great I anchor those frequencies into the canvas to bring a little piece of that feeling for the viewer. So much gratitude to every single situation that has brought me to where I am. Hey, as far as I can tell, the road to Heaven goes through Hell.. so if you’re going through hell, keep going !!!
Never give up on your dreams, be patient and persistent. Believe in yourself, everything is possible. And if you need a hand, feel free to reach out. Few things make me happier than helping and inspiring people to heal themselves.
Theo